There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. ‘Is there anything breakable in here?’ asked the postal clerk.
‘Only the Ten Commandments. ‘ answered the lady.
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‘Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world.
There are those who wake up in the morning and say, ‘Good morning, Lord,’
and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, ‘Good Lord, it’s morning.’
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A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn’t find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: ‘I have circled the block 10 times. If I don’t park here, I’ll miss my appointment. Forgive us our
trespasses.’
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note ‘I’ve circled this block for 10 years. If I don’t give you a ticket I’ll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation.’
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There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: ‘I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it’s still out there in your pockets.’
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A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, ‘Boys and girls, what do we know about God?’ A hand shot up in the air. ‘He is an artist!’ said the kindergarten boy. ‘Really? How do you know?’ the teacher asked. ‘You know – Our Father, who does art in Heaven… ‘
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A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. ‘Reverend,’ said the young man, ‘I’m so sorry about the delay.. It
seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.’ The minister chuckled, ‘I know what you mean. It’s the same in my business.’

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People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the centre of attention.

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A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, ‘I know what the Bible means!’

His father smiled and replied, ‘What do you mean, you ‘know’ what the Bible means?’

The son replied, ‘I do know!’

‘Okay,’ said his father. ‘What does the Bible mean?’
‘That’s easy, Daddy.’ the young boy replied excitedly,

‘It stands for ‘Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.”

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Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson
was about. The daughter answered, ‘Don’t be scared, you’ll get your quilt.’
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor
stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning’s Sunday school
lesson was about. He said ‘Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming.’

I saw this online and thought, everyone loves a laugh on a Friday!!! Some innocent letters to the Pastor from children in the church

Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister. Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville.

Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson. Sincerely, Pete. Age 9, Phoenix

Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something. Robert, Page 11, Anderson

Dear Pastor, I’m sorry I can’t leave more money in the plate, but my father didn’t give me a raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermon about a raise in my allowance? Love, Patty. Age 10, New Haven

Dear Pastor, My mother is very religious. She goes to play bingo at church every week even if she has a cold. Yours truly, Annette. Age 9, Albany

Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven someday because I know my brother won’t be there. Stephen. Age 8, Chicago

Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland. Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma

Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance. Sincerely, Eleanor. Age 12, Sarasota

Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow. Laurie. Age 10, New York City

Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner. Love, Ellen, age 9. Athens

Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God’s help or a new pitcher. Thank you. Alexander. Age 10, Raleigh

Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments. But I don’t think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house. Joshua. Age 10, South Pasadena

Dear Pastor, Who does God pray to? Is there a God for God? Sincerely, Christopher. Age 9, Titusville

Dear Pastor, Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class. Carla. Age 10, Salina

Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished. Ralph, Age 11, Akron

Dear Pastor, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers? Sincerely, Marie. Age 9, Lewiston